His Mortal
by Kimberly Strike
Summary: Darkness. Destruction. Death. All I've ever known. Why me? Why is everything falling apart again? The world is drowning in blood, and no one sees it but me. Why can't I make them see? Why don't they understand? Why can't I make this stop! ... And why... Why can't he just look at anyone else... Just stop, stop looking at me... (My Immortal, re-done.)
1. Chapter 1

Chapter one

AN: This is a remake of My Immortal, by Tara Gilesbie. My brother challenged me to rewrite it entirely. So I challenged him as well. Please compare and review our stories, his account is Lepidolite Mica. Criticism is appreciated, flames are welcome, suggestions are recommended. Please enjoy, and have a nice life, fellow freaks! (^_^)

A name. A name is an identity. A verbal fingerprint. The face of soul in a sea of chaos. A distinguishing mark. An emblem of humanity. A personality that you can express in a word. A complex existence, with all the faults and quirks and traits of a person compressed into a single breath. A name...

Ebony Way.

That name means nothing to me.

My existence, as I have known it to be for the past seventeen years, evaporated in a heartbeat three nights ago. I was wandering the vacant halls of Hogwarts, way past my curfew, when a shrill cry pierced the peace. It sent a fierce jolt down my spine.

'Probably one of those first years.' I snickered to myself, as I regained my composure. ' Turned a corner and ran straight through the Bloody Baron.'

Stupid first years.

I paused my stride, hoping to hear what had become of the kid. Nothing. I shrugged delicately and continued walking. My heels clicked boldly on the polished stone, stepping in tune to an imaginary beat. A warm breath ghosted over my neck.

Inhaling sharply, I whipped my head around; coming face to face with the most chilling red eyes I had ever seen. My hand twitched toward my wand, my mouth opened to scream. Nothing.

An icy hand hovered near my face, I couldn't tear my gaze from his. His deathly pale skin seemed to hang limp from his bones. His toothy grin tore his face in two, stretching across it inhumanly.

"Evening, Prey." He spoke in an ethereal, yet gravely, raspy tone. The words dripped with an unspeakable threat. I shivered involuntarily.

"L-let go of me!" My voice came out as barely a whisper.

I wasn't sure it was possible but his face split further, the corners of his mouth curling near his ears. He leaned forward, brought his other hand up to my shoulder and gripped it harshly. I flinched, or at least tried to. Every muscle in my body ached to retreat. To rip myself away from this foul creature. But, while my mind and soul pleaded desperately to do so, my body stayed rooted. Paralyzed.

"You? Order me?" He breathed.

His fingers tightened, clutching my shoulder rigidly, his other hand grasping my hair. Fingernails dug into my skin, shredding it as his grip grew stronger. My head was ripped violently to the side and razor sharp teeth sank into my neck, slicing my fragile skin and tearing open my artery.

Oh, to die. That would be heaven.

His grip was uncompromising; my body, unyielding. I stood there frozen, incapable of even gasping for air. Burning pain seared through every inch of my being, encompassing my every thought, seizing my last hope. And finally… there was darkness.

Have you ever been so terrified that your heart stops beating? And then it explodes in a brilliant, grotesque display of filthy mortality. Spewing its weakness like venom, infecting everything within its feeble range.

The silence of the explosion scratched furiously through my ears. My miniscule human existence lay sprawled out on the floor of the hall. Like a speck of dust, shoved into the corner of the room.

I have never felt so lost. Unimportant. Invisible. Useless.

Is this what death feels like?

Emptiness?

My hands shook fearfully as I forced myself to stand. My throat felt like I had swallowed a desert, my brain pounded against my skull like a raging elephant in a cage. I blinked rapidly, trying to regain my consciousness. I seemed to be floating halfway between real life and an endless, empty dream. And I wasn't sure which I was in now.

My stomach jerked painfully. I bent double and retched on to the floor, gagging again and again and again. Purging myself of nothing more than acid and blood. Again and again.

I curled over myself. Trembling in exhaustion. Twitching. Jerking. Gasping. Silently.

I shuddered at the memory.

'Why me?' That was the only thought the ran through my head every second until now. Now, three days later. I still haven't got a clue.

A crisp breeze fluttered my long black hair, washing over me like a pleasant friend. The wind was the only one who knew my secret. I cried to it some nights. Slightly pleading anyone out there to listen. To answer. Just, help.

I sighed in acceptance, trudging slowly along the gravel path that wound around Hogwart's campus. Life had continued for everyone else. Laughter ran through the courtyard, whispers of playful schemes passed from one student to another. Like a joke everyone was in on, except me. Life was pleasant for them. Carefree. Hopeful.

"Watch it, Mudblood!"

Someone bumped into me, knocking me off my feet and sending me face first into the snow. Grunting, I turned over and frowned deeply at the jerk. Draco Malfoy. What a surprise.

"What's the matter?" I huffed at him. "Have trouble walking?"

"I'm not the one with their head in the clouds. Homesick or something, freak?" He sneered down at me, pointed nose stuck up in disgust. His posse cackled wickedly behind him. Every one of their ugly faces screwed up in amusement.

I rolled my eyes and flipped him off. "Oh, go kiss a snake, Malfoy."

His eyes flashed dangerously and for a brief moment, they seemed almost red.

"I wouldn't speak like that, if I were you." He snapped back. "You should show more respect, filth."

Standing up, I unhurriedly brushed myself off. Taking my time to look entirely disinterested.

"You'd love that, wouldn't you?" I smirked. "But I don't answer to scum like you."

His face heated up furiously. "Why you little-"

Draco was swiftly cut off by Professor McGonagall calling all the students back indoors. Scowling in irritation, he puffed out his chest and combed back his platinum blonde hair regally. Leaning in towards me, he whispered dangerously,

"One of these days, I'll make you regret your very existence..." He let the threat trail off as he turned to head back up to the school.

"What existence?" I scoffed softly. For a moment, I thought I caught a glimpse of understanding flicker across his face. As quickly as it appeared, it vanished; and so did he and his minions.

Leaving me alone. Again.

AN: So? How was it? (^_^) I LOVE writing about Draco! He's such a pompous ass, but so freakin' hot! *sigh* … one of these days….

Lolz! Thanks for reading! Please R/R, and have a nice life! (^_^)


	2. Chapter 2

AN: My brother and I are doing Pucker Potion Shots! It's Davinci syrups with sour salt. Burns Soooooo Bad! (^_^) Totally worth it! I'm sorry for how long it took to get this next chapter up, I've been on vacation this last week and also been preparing to start college in the fall, so… Yeah. I'll try to get the next chapter up faster. (^_^) Cheers, mate!

It had been a week since that night. I had started noticing a growing thirst for blood, nothing else stayed down long enough to digest before I hurled it back up again. Thankfully, I discovered that my own blood would suffice, at least for now. Seven weeks, with such little food had drained me of all my energy. I could barely get up each day.

I yawned deeply; stretching my arms above my head, my nightshirt riding up lazily. A cool draft wisped through the room. Glaring, I looked over at the window of the girl's seventh year dorms to find it had been left open.

_Probably Willow again. Damn bitch, doesn't understand the word __**winter**_. I seethed to myself as I jammed it shut again. The sound made Willow stir. I froze, silently willing her back to sleep; crossing my fingers as tight as I could.

She merely turned over and went back to sleep. I sighed in relief. Last night I had snuck into a small time hospital in Hogsmeade and raided their blood transfusion supply. It had been offered willingly, so who am I to reject their generosity?

I had stashed it in a hidden jewelry box in the bathroom. I enchanted it to mimic a cooler, to keep the blood cold. Turning on the shower and locking the door, I pulled the box down and gingerly lifted the lid. Several bottles of blood lay on the soft, hot pink, velvet interior; intricate black lace curled around the edges of the box. I hesitated, my hand hovering over one of the bottles.

This is _life._..

This is liquid _life…_

Someone else's...

I whipped my hand back and slammed the lid shut.

'_I can't. I can't do this. This was meant for someone else. This was in someone's body, flowing through their veins. They took it out. They gave it up for someone.' _My mind reeled. Flashes of children and grandparents raced through my mind. '_What if someone needed this right now? What if I've just ruined their last chance at life? '_

'_I'm dying. I need it.' _A voice screamed in my head. '_This is MINE! Forget them! I've felt death. They don't understand. They need to learn. I don't need that again. I'm a freakin' vampire, for heaven's sake! I can't die again. So, if I don't eat, I'll just shrivel up. Starve. Waste away. Forever.'_

_I didn't want to die. But I did. They shouldn't have to. THEY need this! _

_YOU need this! _

The voice echoed into nothingness. I do need this. It's better than killing someone in person. At least I won't have to see them when they go.

_Can you handle that guilt?_

Yes.

I can.

I opened the box again, quickly lifting a bottle and popping the cap off. The salty, metallic scent wafted over me. It was intoxicating. Like I was waking up from a bad dream. Like I was unlocking a secret. A forbidden treat. For no one else.

I subconsciously ran my tongue over my lips, letting my eyelids fall shut as I brought the vial to my mouth. The cold, coppery liquid ran down my throat. The taste spread through me deliciously.

Knock! Knock!

I jerked, spilling the contents of the vial down my chin.

"I-I'm busy! Don't come in!" I shouted at the door, begging my voice not to waver. I scrambled to shove the bottle into the box and hide it back up on the shelf.

"Come on, Ebby! It's just me." Willow's playful voice called through the door. The doorknob jangled threateningly as she tried to come in.

Ripping off my clothes, I jumped into the shower.

"I'm in the shower! Don't come in!" I yelled at her as I pulled the curtains shut.

"Oh, puh-lease." I could almost hear her roll her eyes. "We're all girls here. _Alohamora!_ "

The door sprang open with a loud creak. I quickly scrubbed the blood off my body, just in case.

Willow began rattling off everything about her day, the "freaky weird" dream she had last night, and a bunch of other random facts. I went back to actually showering, purposefully using her hair products in a childish act of revenge. She chatted animatedly for nearly ten minutes non-stop as she did her makeup. I waited patiently, biding my time so she would leave.

_If I come out now, she'll see that I don't have a reflection. Why can't she hurry up?! _

Suddenly she fell quiet. Raising my eyebrows, I waited for the inevitable. Much to my confusion she stayed quiet.

"Something wrong?" I questioned hesitantly.

She let out a long, dramatic sigh and then giggled lightly. "So… I saw you talking to Draco yesterday…"

My face went red. Yesterday I had run into Draco in the hallway and we had quite the row. No one was there, so he looked a bit more confident than normal.

"Not so brave without the professors around, are you?" He laughed cruelly.

I rolled my eyes, glancing over his scrawny form. "I'm not afraid of some spoiled rich punk! Go pick on the first years, you might have better luck scaring little kids."

His eyes narrowed, a red shine flickered through them.

"You talk big now, but you wouldn't be so cocky if you knew what this spoiled rich punk could do to you."

Realization suddenly washed over me.

"Oh? What are you gonna do? Bite me?"

He went rigid.

"What did you say?" He whispered.

The eyes made sense now. His scrawny appearance as well. I donned a smug expression.

"You heard me. You gonna (bite) me?"

He relaxed slightly, his stiff expression morphing into something almost amused.

"Takes one to know one." Draco shot back smoothly. "I saw you sneaking out towards Hogsmeade last night. Having a little snack, are we?"

"I haven't stooped that low yet. Can you say the same?"

He shrugged regally.

"I'll admit to nothing," Striding slowly toward me, he backed me into the wall. He put his hand beside my head and quietly growled, "but I've found certain Slytherins to be quite (delicious)."

His breath ghosted over my ear and sent a sharp shiver raking through my body.

"P-Probably that bitch Pansy." I stammered.

He hummed softly. "A few times. But Willow wasn't bad either."

"Willow?! What did you do to her, you prick?!" I snapped at him, pushing him off me.

"Relax." He threw his hands up casually. "She was more than willing."

My jaw fell open. "Why the hell would she be willing?"

"Perhaps because she got a little treat in return..." He smirked widely.

I cocked an eyebrow and crossed my arms. He shook his head and chuckled mockingly.

"Oh, please. Don't tell me you haven't noticed?" He turned slowly and began to saunter off down to hall. "I thought the whole point of friends was to trust them with your secrets? Pity. She must not trust you…" His voice trailed off as he turned the corner.

A loud growl of complaint from my stomach brought me back to reality.

"Yeah, so?" I said in reply, my face still hot and cherry red.

She waited a moment longer, then continued whatever she had been talking about earlier.

I quickly finished up with my shower and got out as soon as she left the bathroom. Throwing my clothes on, I tried to do my makeup. Rather difficult without a mirror…

When I left the bathroom, I headed over to Willow. "How does my makeup look today?" I asked as casually as I could. She frowned in concentration and dabbed a bit at my eyelid. After a few seconds she stepped back to admire her handiwork and her face split into a beaming smile.

"Perfect! How 'bout mine?"

I glanced her over momentarily, one eyelid had more liner than the other so I balanced them out.

" 'Kay, all good."

As we walked out the Slytherin common room, Willow shoot a mischievous smirk at me.

"Do you like Draco Malfoy?" She blurted out in a single breath.

Whatever I had been about to say lodged itself in my throat. She seemed to notice that I'd been caught off guard because she giggled in glee.

"No, I so fucking don't!" I snapped at her.

"Yeah, right." She rolled her eyes dramatically.

"Hey there, little mosquito." A voice sneered behind me. I turned to see Draco smiling smugly down at me.

His sudden presence shocked my and I shivered in reflex (and not at all because of his close proximity).

"Hello, Malfoy." I replied in as cold a voice as I could muster up, refusing to meet his eyes.

One of his eyebrows twitched in irritation.

"After all we've been through?" He frowned in mock hurt and clutched a hand to his chest. Then his expression melted back into that conceited smirk of his. "Guess what?"

"What?" I humored him as I turned to walk to the Great Hall.

"One of your muggle bands, Good Charlotte or something, is performing near Hogsmeade tonight."

"Really?" My eager voice slipped out before I could remind it that we hated Malfoy.

"Well?" He asked impatiently. "Are you coming with me?"

Unable to resist, I dramatically gasped at him.


	3. Chapter 3

**Woooowww… Words cannot begin to describe how sorry I am…. I haven't been on Fanfiction for so long, I forgot I had an account.**

**College has been really overwhelming lately, so I'm gonna try to write as much as I can and post it throughout the next quarter. **

**Damn…. Now I need to go back and read everything I wrote….**

****FAIR WARNING**: it gets a bit dark towards the end. Do not read if sensitive to morbid kinds of stuff.**

* * *

_I can't believe I agreed to this! _My inner voice screamed desperately. As if hopeful that, out of nowhere, someone would come flying down and take me away to a magical land with pixies and -

Yeah, right.

Guess I'll just have to suck it up. Why did I say yes? Why the hell am I _actually_ going with him?

No fucking clue.

I sighed and begrudgingly pulled myself out of my bed. It was pitch black in the dorm room, and slightly chilly due to Willow and her fear of closed windows. All I wanted was to crawl back under my covers and sleep well into tomorrow. But some irritating, strangle-worthy voice in my head wouldn't let me.

I lumbered silently over to the bathroom; sleepy, but careful not to wake anyone. That could only worsen the situation.

Instinctually, I glanced over at the mirror. Nothing.

I suppose you get used to it eventually. Being a vampire isn't all that bad. At least you can… Or you've got… Hmmm...

Oh, yeah. That's right. There's no upside.

My stomach clenched up and growled angrily. Yay, another downside. Drinking the life-blood of living, breathing, sentient human beings.

Sighing, I pulled out my stash and opened the chest. The scent wafted over me, embracing me in it's tantalizing smell. I almost wanted to hurl. To throw the box away. Why does it have to be blood? Why couldn't vampires eat chocolate? But the smell doesn't concede to my will and instead grows ever-stronger as I open a bottle.

Might as well. It's not like I'm hurting anyone.

As soon as I finish my make-shift meal, I quickly hid the chest away and go on to the next priority. What to wear…?

_Why am I even bothering to think about this? It's not like I'm trying to impress him or anything. _

I open the large chest at the foot of my bed as quietly as I can, careful not to wake anyone. Digging aimlessly through it, I hold up various outfits. One by one, they all go back in the box.

_I'll just wear something comfortable. Something casual. _

I pull out a soft pair of loose-fitting, black pants and a grey, sweater-like top.

_These always feel the best!_

Without hesitation, they go back in the box. Next comes my favorite jacket: bleached and worn with gun-metal grey studs, and my torn jeans.

_Too trashy. Too fake. Too pretty. Too low. Too short. Not short enough._

Top after top, shoe after shoe, _everything _goes back in the chest. I freeze in my tracks.

_What the hell am I doing? This shouldn't be that hard! Alright, let's start this again._

Feet: Black boots. Comfy, durable, cute. Done.

Legs: Tights? Only one pair. Torn but warm. Bright red? I can deal with that. Done.

Body: Dress? I've got a black one. That'll work. Done.

Arms: I could wear those awesome arm-sleeves that match the tights!- No. Bad idea. Jacket instead. I've got a black leather one. Done.

_Well, that took exceptionally longer than I had anticipated. Next step: hair and makeup- Wait! Why the hell should I care?!_

* * *

Despite my previous position on the matter, I ended up straightening my hair and attempting to dab on some semblance of appropriate makeup.

Pleased with myself for how quickly I had dressed, I subconsciously checked the bathroom mirror. Shockingly, I saw more than I had expected. Floating in the mirror was my outfit for the evening, which was expected; above that hovered a set of eye-shaped outlines and a pair of lips.

For a moment, I was dumbfounded. I thought I was invisible!

_Ebony? Honestly? Is makeup (or clothing) a __**body part**__? Of course you can see them! _

I paused.

When did this become normal?

When did I get so used to this that I'm okay with it?

_This!_ This whole vampire-thing! No mirrors, drink blood, hang out with other vampires. Why does all this not phase me?!

I am a naturally evil, corrupted, _demonic_ creature. I eat _sentient lives_! _For lunch!_ As if it's nothing. Just a snack, a nibble, _food._ I literally drink the life-blood of creatures that walk and talk and feel and _live_! Things like me should never be allowed anywhere near other lifeforms. Let alone live with them. Learn with them. Even breathe the same air!

_But you're not like that! You've never hurt anyone. You never will._

My throat went dry. My tongue turned to sandpaper in my mouth, weakly scratching around, trying to soften the sting of my thoughts.

_And what if I do?! I will run out of this blood-bank shit -and blood that was willingly given!- and what then? I'm not going to let myself _starve_! … should I?_

Fear. Darkness. My mind spiraled downward, deeper and deeper into a abyss of emotions. What would I do? If I ever ran out...

_No! Of course not! You'll get through this. Just taking a little blood won't kill anyone._

But it will.

_It will turn them! Turn them into something like me!_

And what is worse than death? Being the _giver_ of it. Being the _taker_ of life. What worse murder, what worse act than to take a person's ability to choose.

To choose to kill, or to leave alive.

The choice is gone when you're like this. You _need_ to kill. To take a life is the only way to live. To spare a life is the only way to die.

…

Die.

Yes.

That would, naturally, be the answer.

A sharp, cold ray of moonlight flickered across something in my peripheral. Willow's shiny, silver trim scissors.

_Death. Death is the only way. Death is the only way to escape._

My hand trembled in objection as I reached for them.

_I'll never give this curse to anyone. No one will ever have to live like this. Not by my hand._

They felt smooth in my hand. Their delicately engraved, shiny metal surface cooled the skin of my palm. Like ice on a hot, summer's day. Comforting.

_Everything will be okay._

They opened easily. As if to say, "Welcome. What can I do for you?"

_Kill me._

I spread the blades apart and gripped one side firmly.

_Take my life, so I don't have to take others'._

Without a thought, my body found itself collapsed on its knees, bent over the floor of the shower. I slowly brought the scissor's edge to my wrist.

_I don't want to hurt anyone._

The blade gently caressed my pale skin, singing to it, "Use me. _Use me._"

And I cut.

* * *

**So, that got pretty dark…. I'm not entirely sure if I did it **_**right**_ **per-se but I wanted to elaborate on the line from the original: "**_I felt a little depressed then, so I slit one of my wrists._" **Cause nobody just **_**does**_ **that. ;P And I also changed around the sequence of events a bit from the original so it would work better with my adjustments. (^_^)**

**I'm going to cut chapter 3 into two chapters so I can cover all the changes I made. I have a few revision strategies for the next part that stem from this one.**

… _**Revision strategies**_**? **_**Stem from**_**?... I've been gone for a while and my Composition class is **_**still**_ **rearing it's ugly head. :'(**

**Anywho, I'll try to knock out several more chapters over the course of my vacation (or what's left of it…) so that I can post them in increments over Spring quarter. (^_^)I can't promise they'll be all that long… But I don't think the rest of my chapters have been either. **

**With that: see ya, freaks! ^(^_^)^ **


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